Chapter 854 Regret Is Useless
While Lucy was still reeling over the shocking news and wondering how Lucas was going to take it since the news was bound to get to him, the phone rang again. This time it was Sonia.
"Lucy, have you heard?" Sonia asked excitedly before Lucy could say a word.
"About Rachel?" Lucy asked, wondering if there was perhaps another news she needed to hear.
"Yes! God! I thought today was going to be a bad day after that bastard showed up to get Mia, but I guess it isn't so bad after all," Sonia said, and Lucy frowned.
"Isn't so bad? Are you happy she took her own life? Christ, Sony!" Lucy exclaimed in disbelief.
"What? You're not happy? Okay, maybe not happy, but isn't the air lighter where you are? I mean one less horrible person sharing the oxygen on the earth with us?" Sonia asked, and Lucy shook her head.
"We are talking about a human being, Sony. A human being is dead. She took her life," Lucy said, not pleased with Sonia's insensitivity.
"Exactly! She took her own life. I didn't. She didn't die in an accident. Her death was her choice, so why should I be sad? She wasn't even a good person. You know me, Lu. I don't pretend. If I'm down for you, I'm totally down. And if I'm not, I'm not. I won't pretend to feel sorry or like her now simply because she is dead. Rachael was a horrible person. That bitch was the witch that tried to come between Lucas and you. Did you forget what you told me she did to Amy's late best friend? I'm not going to act like I'm sad about the news of her death," Sonia said and Lucy sighed.
"I'm not asking you to pretend to be sad. But you can at least not be so excited about it. I told you she was here on Tuesday to see me. Do you have any idea how I feel knowing that I might have pushed her into taking such a drastic decision?" Lucy asked and Sonia rolled her eyes.
"For heaven's sake, Lu. You didn't push her into doing that. Rachel did what she did for herself. She did it because you made her realize that you know all she did. You opened her eyes to the fact that Lucas is never getting back with her, which is true. If she wasn't such a horrible person in the first place, none of this would have happened. But then again, what do you expect when her family is just as horrible? Come to think of it, why didn't she take her life this whole time? Why didn't she come to your office to beg to see Lucas this whole time? Why did she have to wait until her family lost everything? Wasn't it the same Rachel who got your mom arrested? Did she really plan to get back with Lucas when she did that?" Sonia asked, and as she spoke, Lucy thought about all the points she was raising and they all made sense to her.
"You may be right…"
"Not may, Lu. I am fucking right and I know it. You better not feel sorry or blame yourself for shit. If she felt that death would bring her the peace she needs, shouldn't you be happy for her that she has peace now? If you ask me, I think this was her final attempt to get Lucas' attention even in death, and I really hope Lucas doesn't fall for it," Sonia said and Lucy sighed deeply.
"Well, I hope so. I will talk to you later, So. I need to call Lucas. He should hear it from us. You know, prepare him for the bombshell before he sees it online or something."
Ending the call, Lucy stared at the phone, its weight suddenly unbearable. How could she break this to Lucas, knowing how much he had cared for her? The news would break his heart, but the possibility of him finding out through a stranger on TV was too awful to contemplate.
Taking a deep, shaky breath, she dialed Tyler's number, her heart pounding a frantic rhythm against her ribs.
"Sup, LuLu? Lucas just went to bed," Tyler said with a yawn since he too was getting ready to go to sleep. It was late at night already.
"Oh. Alright," Lucy said, feeling sort of glad that she didn't have to break the news to him now.
"Is something wrong?" Tyler asked with concern when he heard the relief in her voice.
"Uhm, sort of. Rachel is dead," Lucy said, and Tyler let out a low whistle.
"Damn! What happened to her?" Tyler asked, surprised by the news.
"It's on the news. She committed suicide, and she mentioned Lucas in the suicide letter. Do you think that maybe you can tell him about it before he hears or sees it from somewhere? I mean, I know he's probably over her, but she is still someone he used to love," Lucy said and Tyler sighed deeply.
"Sure. I will tell him about it in the morning. We just got here a couple of hours ago..."
"Why? I thought you left on Monday?" Lucy asked in surprise.
"Yeah. That was the plan, but something came up," Tyler said, not wanting to tell Lucy that they had changed their plan because Lucas wanted to attend the funeral and make sure Amy was alright and well received.
"Uhm, how is Mia?" Tyler asked hesitantly since he was still feeling bad about what he had caused.
He had seen the news about Henry Rosewood finding his wife who was thought to be dead, and that had made him feel even more terrible.
"He came to get her in the early hours of today. Her husband, I mean," Lucy said and Tyler sighed deeply.
"Do you think she will be okay? Should I try to look out for…"
"No!" Lucy cut in quickly, "Do not ever get involved. I'm sure Tom told you not to talk to your colleague about this, right? Keep acting like you are oblivious to everything. That's the only way Mia's plan can work," Lucy said and Tyler raised a brow.
"What plan?"
"I can't share it with you, Ty. Especially because I don't want you to get involved in any way. This whole thing might be dangerous, so stay out of it. I mean it," Lucy said firmly and Tyler nodded.
"Alright. I've heard you. If I'm needed to step in in any way, do not hesitate to let me know, okay?" Tyler said and Lucy sighed.
"Okay."
"How is Tom?" Tyler asked and Lucy shrugged.
"Busy being a CEO," she said and Tyler narrowed his eyes.
"Is that your way of bragging to me that your boyfriend is a wealthy CEO?" He asked in a teasing tone, and Lucy smiled.
"I don't have to brag. It's a generally known fact," Lucy said and then raised an eyebrow when she saw Amy standing outside her door.
"I've got to go now, Ty. Let Lucas know that I called, and please break the news to him," Lucy said before hanging up, glad that she had been able to shift this unpleasant responsibility to Tyler.
The moment she dropped the phone, she signalled Amy to come in. Amy had resumed work by noon the previous day, and was looking much better than she had been in while.
"Is there a problem?" Lucy asked Amy as she walked in.
"No," Amy said, then cleared her throat, her voice hesitant. "It's just that I saw the news about Rachel and I was sort of wondering… is Lucas alright?" She asked, and before Lucy could answer, Amy rushed on, her words tumbling out in a torrent.
"I mean, I know she is his ex. And please don't think I'm being presumptuous, like... like I read something wrong into Lucas's kindness. He was just so nice, and I felt terrible seeing that news. I know Lucas was kind to me, and he mentioned how you suggested he might be leading me on, so don't get me wrong! I'm not… I mean, I don't for a second think he's… in love with me or anything like that. I just… because he was nice, I was worried about him, you know? I'm just… concerned since he was really nice to me."
Lucy couldn't help but feel a bit amused by Amy's rambling. It surprised her that Lucas had told Amy what she said. When did Lucas talk to her? And how could he have told her she said that? Why would he do that? Lucy mused.
"No, no," Lucy cut her off gently. "I understand. It's perfectly okay to be concerned. You don't have to explain any of that to me," Lucy said, offering her a small, tired smile.
"Thanks, for your understanding. So, uhm, how is he doing?" Amy asked still standing.
She was still hoping she would receive an email from Lucas.
"Do you want to sit?" Lucy asked, gesturing to the seat opposite her, and Amy sat down.
"Thank you."
"I haven't actually spoken to Lucas yet. Tyler's going to… to tell him. He was asleep, so we couldn't talk," Lucy explained, and Amy nodded.
"Could you let me know when you hear from him? Do you think… do you think Lucas will be okay?" she asked quietly.
Lucy studied her for a moment, the raw concern in Amy's eyes making her wonder if Amy was really only concerned because Lucas was kind to her, or if she had developed feelings for Lucas.
"I don't know, honestly," Lucy admitted. "They were together for a long time," Lucy said, wanting to see how interested Amy would be.
"A long time?" Amy asked curiously since she had been wondering just how long Lucas had dated Rachel.
Although she had heard about their relationship and what led to their break up from Miley, she did not have any idea how long the two had been together.
"Since high school. They were engaged and going to get married until Lucas broke things off," Lucy explained without going into the details, and Amy's eyes widened in realization.
That would be almost ten years. He had been with her for almost ten years?
"Now I understand," Amy murmured, thinking that she got the picture now, and understood why he wouldn't want to go into any relationship soon.
She also also understand why Rachel would feel so devastated over losing someone like Lucas. He was a catch and it was definitely a huge lose. She would feel shattered if she lost a man like Lucas.
If he didn't love her and had done all of that for her and treated her so well because he was merely being nice, she couldn't imagine how wonderful a partner he must have been to Rachel.
"If you don't mind me asking, when did you talk to Lucas? I mean, when did he tell you about what I said?" Lucy asked curiously.
"At the funeral," Amy said, and Lucy's brow arched.
Was that what Tyler had meant when he said something came up? Or did something come up and Lucas seized the opportunity to show up at the funeral?
"Oh! I didn't know he made it to the funeral," Lucy said and Amy's lips twitched when she remembered what Lucas had said about being there to clear the air so she wouldn't think he was leading her on.
"Well, he thought it was best to tell me to my face that he didn't love me and was only being his nice self," Amy explained and Lucy winced.
"He said that, didn't he?" She asked, and Amy smiled.
"I'm sorry I told him that and made him come to your best friend's funeral just to say that. Put the blame on me," Lucy said and this time Amy managed a small laugh.
"It wasn't that bad," she assured Lucy, "I was happy to see him. I was glad I could say goodbye and thank him too," Amy said and Lucy nodded.
"Well, I'm glad then."
"I see. I, uh… I should probably get back to work then," she said, but made no attempt to rise.
"Is there something else you wanted to say?" Lucy asked, looking at her with interest.
"What about you? Are you okay? I mean, I don't know if you were both ever close. But she was here a couple of days ago and you must be shocked," Amy said, since she had seen Lucy crying earlier, through the glass door.
Lucy drew a deep breath, "I'm shocked, no doubt. And I was feeling somewhat guilty and wondering if there was something I could have said or done that day to stop this from happening. If for nothing, but Lucas' sake," she said and Amy nodded.
"Was? You don't feel guilty anymore?" Amy asked and Lucy shrugged.
"I don't know. She did what she felt she needed to do. I don't think I would have changed anything I said to her. The truth is, even if we turn back the hands of time, I don't see myself hugging her or promising to help her get back with Lucas. So, It's not on me. My regret is useless," Lucy said honestly, and Amy nodded.
"That's true. Regret is useless. You should fix your makeup," Amy said as she started rising to leave, and then paused.
She had been thinking about it since her conversation with Lucas, and it was best she asked now so she would know where she stood with Lucy.
"Can I ask you a question? As a friend?" She asked, and Lucy nodded.
"Sure. Go ahead."
"I just wanted to ask, did you tell Lucas that because you might have a problem with me developing feelings for him or something?" She asked carefully.
"No. Not at all. I have no problem with you having feelings for him or even dating him. I just wanted him to make sure he knew what he was doing and wasn't leading you on," Lucy explained, and Amy smiled as she rose.
"Alright then. Thanks," Amy said, and as Lucy watched her leave, she couldn't help but wonder if Amy had asked her that because she was interested in Lucas.
Thinking about Lucas, Lucy sighed. She hoped that he would be alright. She hoped that he would heal completely from Rachel and move on. He deserved to be happy.
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